Kootenai River in NW Montana, near Canadian Border

Kootenai River in NW Montana, near Canadian Border
photo by Gene Tunick of Eureka, Montana

Friday, January 24, 2014

Best of the Worst #9

Counting down to #1 on my "Best of the Worst" list of country song titles. We've passed into what overseas troops used to call "single digit midget" territory. Wonder if they still use that expression...

#9 – I Don't Know Whether to Kill Myself or Go Bowling

#10 – If Fingerprints Showed Up On Skin, Wonder Whose I'd Find On You.
#11 – My Wife Ran Off With My Best Friend (And I Sure Do Miss Him)
#12 – If the Jukebox Took Teardrops (I’d Cry All Night Long)
#13 – You Done Stomped On my Heart (and You Mashed That Sucker Flat) - written by Mason Williams of "Classical Gas" fame, recorded by John Denver & others
#14 – If I Had Shot You When I Wanted To, I'd Be Out By Now
#15 – My Cellmate Thinks I'm Sexy (by Cletus T. Judd – a parody of Kenny Chesney's “She Thinks My Tractor's Sexy”)
#16 – You Put My Heart in an Old Tin Can and Shot it off a Stump
#17 – If I Can't Be Number One In Your Life, Then Number Two On You
#18 – We Used to Just Kiss on the Lips but Now It's All Over
#19 – Tequila Makes Her Clothes Fall Off
#20 – It Ain't Easy Being Easy (by Roseanne Cash)
#21 – I Went Back to My Fourth Wife for the Third Time and Gave Her a Second Chance to Make a First Class Fool Out of Me
#22 – Looks Like I’ll Be Drinking Christmas Dinner Alone Again This Year
#23 – I'm Gonna Hire A Wino To Decorate Our Home
#24 – She's Out Doing What I'm Here Doing Without
#25 – Your Wife’s Cheating On Us Again
#26 – If You Want to Keep the Beer Real Cold, Put it Next to My Ex-Wife's Heart
#27 - You Stuck my Heart in an Old Tin Can and Shot it off a Stump
#28 – Red Necks, White Socks, and Blue Ribbon Beer (by Johnny Russell)
#29 – Who You Gonna Believe, Me Or Your Lying Eyes?
#30 – The Day My Wife Met My Girlfriend (by Rodney Carrington)
#31 – You Ain't Much Fun Since I Quit Drinkin'

A photo from my Kalispell friend Sue Haugan of the moon looking down on a snowy Montana landscape. Makes me wonder - how come we sometimes see the moon in daylight, but never see the sun at night? Hmmm...

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